I see you are “cooking” over there.

I have some significant concerns regarding your technique. In addition, that food does not appear to be designed for my consumption.

Significant. Concerns.

Due to mercurial cat reasons I am not inclined to explain, I disapprove of the NBA Playoffs. Your television is large; my presence is larger.

I have spoken.

It’s hot… but not too hot for killing.

The Dark One is lurking nearby again. He is obviously a footsoldier of the apocalypse. I will stare at him with greatest intensity until his head explodes.

I killed something.

My kitchen window surveillance paid off. I informed them that an enemy was approaching the border, yet they do nothing. My puffed tail twitched.

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